Diary of a Mad Man

It's day 5 since the surgery and I'm starting to lose it. The itching is starting to dominate every aspect of my day. My nose and ear feel like a million tiny ants, the size of microbes have descended upon them and are tickling in unison. Yes,,,,I'm sure it orchestrated,,,,there is an intellect behind this torture, this evil, this truly unbearable existence is being directed by aliens, demons from hell,,,,,I,,,,,,,,can't,,,,,,,,,stand,,,,,,it,,,,,,,,,,,,ARRRRGGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
Where's my AK47,,,,,,,,where's my whip,,,,,,,,,where's my teddy bear,,,,,,,,,Mommy?!?

All joking aside, today has been totally miserable. Allergies kicked in, sneezing, nose running, itching, constant, unending, unbearable, itching, itching, itching. It's made work extremely difficult and miserable. Did I say I was miserable yet?

But it's a good sign. A sign of healing. But I tell you,,,,,from looking at the pics below, I don't see any real healing on the outside. I took these tonight as I was cleaning the site and changing the dressing.



I'll post pics next week and we'll see if there is any improvement.

I did work out tonight for the first time since surgery. I didn't push it, just 31 minutes on the treadmill at a nice 3 mph pace. All was good until I started sweating. It was hot down in the basement,,,,,and the sweat started getting under the bandages,,,,,and,,,,,,the itching started,,,,,just a little a first,,,,,but it got worse and worse,,,,,,and,,,,,,,and I started visioning hatchets,,,,,and axes,,,,and machetes,,,,and,,,,and guns,,,,,oh yea,,,oh yea,,,,,,,

Whew,,,,that was close. Did I tell you my nose was itching a little?

Anyway, I've gained a few pounds since this whole cancer thing started. About 12 to be exact. Call it stress eating, not working out enough, lack of motivation. Pick your poison. But I'm back now and working to Curahee. My new, adjusted goal is 230 lbs for Curahee in Oct. And to finish the mountain in 2 hrs. I'm just trying to be realistic here.

I do appreciate all the emails I've received from everyone. It really does help, (not with the itching),,,,but with the stress of dealing with this type of issue. Thanks specifically to Paul and Steph,,,,who I've never met,,,,but who never fail to send me words of encouragement.

Ok,,,,enough mushy, gushy stuff. It was my Father-in-Laws Birthday Sunday and here are some pics of him, my girls and my niece Lindsay.

Let the Itching Begin

I now feel like I have poison ivy on my face and ear. It just won't stop. It's relentless. I realize, logically, with my brain that its just the skin and flesh healing. BUT OHHHHHMMMYYYYGOOODNESSSSMAAAAKKKKEEEITTTTTTSTOOOPPPPPPPPPP!!!!! ARRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OK,,,,, I feel a little better now. Up close I still look like Frankenstein

Vic's down again, so I cleaned my dressings myself this evening. So I'm covered in Hydrogen Peroxide, Polysporin, went through about 50 Qtips and 3 gauze pads. But by dingy,,,,,,the wound is now dressed.

Anyway,,,,looks like my new nose may be crooked. Could be the swelling and healing,,,,but I really think it's going to be crooked. I don't remember asking for Owen Wilson's nose. I wouldn't mind his money,,,,,,but not his nose.

Anyway,,,,start working out again tomorrow. I'm sure I've gained 15lbs over the last week. So I've got my work cut out for me.

G'nite All.

Nose Damage Assessment (NDA)

After the bombers attack a target recon satellites or jets take photos of the aftermath to see if objectives were destroyed. This is affectionatly referred to as BDA, Bomb Damage Assessment. Well, in the case of my nose the objective to remove the cancer was acheived, so the only thing to assess is the nose damge.

Behold - the NDA of Joe's nose.


I guess this one is an Ear Damage Assessment. It's where they got the cartilage to rebuild my nose.

The Procedure

It’s the morning after and my face feels like Evander Holyfields punching bag. But I finally got to sleep last night around midnight and got some rest. I promised the story and pics, so here they are. I’m still on pain pills, so if I ramble a bit I apologize in advance.

We showed up way early to the medical center. All because I wanted to make sure we beat traffic. It was a good thing cause I had to spend 20 minutes in the little boys room replaying a certain scene from Dumb and Dumber. Pretty sure it was the nervousness of having my face cut on, not knowing who I’d be when it was all over.

We were called back to the procedure room where the lovely nurse gave me two valium to chew up. Not a bad taste if you like eating bark or weed roots or something. She said by chewing them up it would get in my system faster. And they did. J

The doc came in, some chit chat, jokes, he met Vic, then it was time to start. The first part was the numbing of my nose. When I had the biopsy they also numbed my nose and it was quite painful. Afterwards I teared, sneezed and snotted for 5 minutes, it wasn’t pretty. But my nurse yesterday was awesome. One little stick and that was it.

They let the numbing take effect for about 10 minutes then it was time to start carving the turkey. Slice, slice, slice, a little blood, more slicing. No big deal really except it was taking place right in front of my eyes. The doc told me to keep my eyes closed, but I had to watch. Big roundish chunk they removed, right off the end of my nose. Then they cauterized the site to prevent bleeding while lab checked the first cut of meat. There’s nothing quite like hearing the sound of your flesh being burned, unless of course it’s the acidic smell of your flesh being burned. I tried to get Vic to take pics of this part, but she wasn’t getting any closer than she had to for that procedure.

Then it was out to the waiting area while the lab determined if they’d gotten all the cancer. The valium had kicked in real good by this point, so the iPod was cranked. I tried to read some of Tom Clancy’s – Hunt for Red October, but between the nerves, excitement, valium and smell of burnt flesh,,,,it wasn’t a real possibility.

They called me back in and the doc explained he’d gotten ALL the cancer on the first hack. This was great news!!! Although he took a lot of the end of my nose already, he would have had to take much more if there were still cancer there. Again, this was great news to me. I was able to relax a little now. So now it was time to rebuild my nose.

To rebuild my nose they had to take cartilage from my ear so out come the needles again to numb the ear. Once numbed, more slicing, cartilage removal, pulling and stretching of skin, more cutting, more skin removal and moving, slicing, stretching etc. This was by far the longest part of the procedure. And according to Vic through it all my mouth NEVER STOPPED. She said the valium had me just a humming, telling every Navy story I could think of.

Near the end I found out my doc was also a triathlete. His name is Mark Baucom if anyone knows him. We talked about my efforts this year to lose weight and Curahee. I told him I was still primarily walking, but had started running a little each night. Walk 5-8 minutes, then run 2-4. He said his sister was like me, started out walking, then would run the distance between 2 telephone poles, then walk a while and repeat. She kept at it and was now running races. He then tells me I can start walking again in 2 days, and will be able to start running and lifting weights in 1 week. MUCH better news than I was prepared for. So I’m pretty happy right now.

With everything done it was time to go home. I was worried the girls would be scared of my bandages and stuff when we got home, but they weren’t. Alyssa says I look like an elf. I didn’t realize til I got home how little bandages I actually had. And since they’re skin colored, they don’t stand out.

I worked a good portion of the afternoon. My teams had some integration testing and patch loadings taking place and I just couldn’t keep myself away from it. But eventually I did, cranked the iPod and layed down.

Well, that’s about it. It wasn’t best case scenario with regard to size of the removal, but it surely wasn’t worst case either. Doc says that when it heals I should look better than when I walked into his door. I gotta say,,,,the man is confident, and I like him. If there are two people in the world I don’t mind being a bit cocky and arrogant, it’s fighter pilots and plastic surgeons.

Vic took pics during the procedure. And here they are.






Here I am this morning. The color of these bandages really make me look almost normal. But I don't see where Alyssa gets the Elf comment.

One more thing, Haily lost another tooth. It was so loose I was able to pull it out with my fingers.


Thanks everyone for your thoughts, prayers and emails of support and encouragement.

It's Over

Just wanted to let everyone know the surgery is over.
Took about 4 hours, they got all the cancer, and I have a new nose.

In a lot of pain right now, so I'll go into the details tomorrow. Vic took pictures during the procedure, I'll post them to.

G'nite all.

End of an Era

The surgery is tomorrow. Will it be 2 stitches and a Tylenol or a total nose reconstruction. I'll let you guys be the judge by posting pics as soon as possible.

The surgery will take 4-8 hours I believe. Depends on how much they remove. In between slices, I have to go to a waiting area until they determine if they got it all. I'm taking my iPod, Blackberry and a book for this down time. Even so, I'll be bored to tears I'm sure.

I just had a thought, what if I sneeze during the procedure? Ouch,,,,that won't be good.

Hailey wanted me to post some pics of the old nose before the surgery, so here they are.

G'nite all.

The Surprise

So the surprise coming with Gran Gran and Pa Paw was my niece Lindsay. She's my favorite niece actually and we're all glad to have her here. Hey,,,,you know,,,,,I think she's my only niece. Anyway, so now it's really a house full of girls. Pa Paw and I can do nothing but hide.

I took all the girls to the pool yesterday evening and today and they've had a blast. Hailey's learning to swim really well. Standing on her hands, doing flips underwater.

Alyssa is still wearing floaties, but I think she'll be done with those soon. She's starting to open her eyes underwater without a mask or goggles. I tell ya,,,,,Navy Seal material.

And Gracie is still our social butterfly. Tonight is a great example.
- She co-opts another Mom in the pool to swim around with her. I've never seen this woman before in my life.
- The Mom's name is Catherine, but Gracie insists on calling her Elizabeth,,,,and does.
- She finds a group of boys around 10-12 years old playing by the big water mushroom. The boys are laying down on the ground in the water, so Gracie proceeds to run around all of them and over them splashing water into their faces. She had never seen these boys before tonight. And they didn't seem to mind the extra water.

Lindsay is a great swimmer and after my superb lessons last night in throwing and catching a ball she did MUCH better playing catch tonight. (Last night - she caught 1 ball thrown her way, tonight 20 balls). Yep, this proves I can teach anyone. (I can't let her read this or I'll find myself glued to the bed.)

Here's Gracie under the mushroom, without the boys.

Alyssa floating.

Hailey getting ready to do an underwater flip.

Lindsay pulling Gracie around the pool.

Alyssa just getting airborne during a jump into the pool.

The landing. Look at that form and distance.


Gracie picking up every toy around the pool.

Lindsay practicing throwing a ball.

Gracie posing.

Lindsay laughing at one of my jokes.

Hailey's Recital

Yesterday was Hailey’s 5th Ballet recital, and it couldn't have come on a better day. Vic was relatively headache free all day. First time this week.

Hailey performed 3 numbers.
- a Tap number to “We Like to Party”, (The Six Flags Commercial song)
- a jazz number to “I Don’t Dance’, from High School Musical 2
- a Ballet number to “Enchanted Suite” from the movie Enchanted

As usual, she did a wonderful job and was beautiful. She wants to be a member of Steps Dance Company, but that’s a lot of hard work and a lot of expense. I told her she’d have to work out all summer long and get in real good shape to audition and make company.
So, I have another, albeit inspirational, goal for this summer.

One thing that I did discover yesterday in the recital was that the artist Fergie has a pretty good voice. I’d never heard the song Finally before. Some of the older Company dancers did a number to the song and it was beautiful. It’s stuck in mine and Vic’s head, so I had to download from iTunes.

Gran Gran and Pa Paw Kelly are coming in today. The kids are really excited, but what they don’t know is they’re bringing a big surprise. Can’t say now what it is, I’ll let the cat out tonight.
All for now. More later.

Oh and here are pics from the recital. Unfortunately we were sitting really far back and my digital camera only has a 3x optical zoom, so I had to use the digital zoom. Next camera will have a minimum 10x optical zoom.

Vacation Update

Bottom line, we had a great time. Vic got a little sick from the car ride, probably due to the meds, but otherwise was headache free the whole trip.

The first night we went to the beach and let the girls splash in the water till after midnight. It was the first time on a beach for Gracie and Alyssa was only 8 months old the last time she was on a beach. It was a little scary for them, but they adjusted well. Didn’t get to bed till after 1am. This late start didn’t prevent them from waking up at 7am ready to go.

Friday
We got up, got the mongrels dressed, had a huge breakfast and hit the pools.
Liberal amounts of sunscreen were applied. My rule to Vic when purchasing the sunscreen was to get 12 oz, per child, per day. And we used it. Me, I had so much sunscreen on my face I looked like a member of KISS.

Kids Pool:
The resort calls it Aqualand, a fenced in area with lots of kid friendly water stuff. The water is only 8 inches deep at the most and it has a lifeguard assigned. The girls spent 5 ½ hours there on Friday. They loved the place. Especially Gracie, who got in trouble with the lifeguard twice for going up the slide backwards.
Gracie also proved to be quite the social butterfly. She had to introduce herself to every child and parent there and insert herself into any game or activity they were engaged in. Whether they wanted her to or not. No one can say she’s shy, that’s for sure.




Main Pool:
After a bite of lunch and a quick nap for Gracie we hit the big pool. Hailey’s doing very good with her swimming. Alyssa and Gracie used floaties. Alyssa also had a diving mask and spent an enormous amount of time face down in the water looking at the bottom. (I always said she was going to be the first female US Navy Seal.)

We spent about 3 hours at the main pool meeting people, playing and chasing the girls. Since I’m a big, loud cut up while playing with my girls I became somewhat of a magnet to totally strange children. They’d come from out of nowhere climbing on me, wanting me to sling them around, throw them, bounce them etc. I never turned a kid down, but I was a little uneasy not knowing where their parents were.

It became apparent a LOT of parents were off doing ‘other’ things and not paying attention to their children. This was painfully apparent at one point when I saw a 4-5 yr old boy floundering in the middle of the pool (5ft deep). He was going under for the second time when I finally got to him and pulled him out. He latched on to me like a leech, scared to death. I held on to him, told him it would be ok and took him to the side of the pool. As soon as I got him there he ran off like blur. No idea where his parents were or what he was doing in the middle of the pool. When our girls were in the pool Vic or I were right there with them, on the side or in the water.

Music:
They say a business has to ‘know’ their customers. Or an artist must ‘know’ their audience. Well, I would say a DJ needs to know who’s listening to their music.

On the whole pool deck area of the resort there were speakers mounted, including the main pool, kiddie pool, grill, bar etc. They played the musical selections of our 50’ish, tall, white, over-weight DJ. No one was immune to his choices be it noise or music. Regarding this, I have a few comments.

1. After a few hours on Friday morning I told Vic it felt like Christmas, cause the DJ kept playing a lot of rap where they kept making the Ho noise. It was Ho this and Ho that,,,and some times Ho’o Ho’o. I was expecting old Saint Nick to pop out of the pool at any second. Everyone seemed to accept this noise around them, but I made a personal note that on Saturday I was going to choose the pool chairs farthest away from the speakers.

2. While everyone seemed ambivalent to the rap being played it was quite the opposite whenever he put on Lynrd Skynrd or Molly Hatchet. The pool area would erupt with whoops and hollers, beer cans being raised in the air, hands over peoples hearts, voices singing, tattooed women dancing,,,,,,,. It was a sight and sound so moving, so touching it brought me to tears, ‘sniff’ ‘sniff’,,,,,,I’m all choked up just thinking about it. Where’s my Dale cap?

Anyway, I didn’t understand why the DJ kept playing rap since it was obvious the audience preferred southern rock or country to the rap noise and Ho sound. So, I’ve decided the DJ was under orders from the resort or perhaps the city itself to only play southern rock or country about 20% of the time. Otherwise the pool would turn into a NASCAR event with unending drinking, debauchery, fights and perhaps drownings, which might hurt business or tourism.

Dinner:
Friday night we were headed to a nice restaurant for dinner, when our children decided to change plans. While headed to the restaurant, we passed a 3-story pirate ship which housed several restaurants, pirates, shops and fun for kids. We went there instead. I have two comments about this place.

The good: There was a roaming magician who, for a nice tip, would entertain the kiddies with lame magic tricks. Well,,,,they were lame to me,,,,the girls LOVED them.

The bad: The fare at your neighborhood Denny’s was as good or better than the grub served by this place. Only 5 times cheaper. Never going there again.

Saturday:
We started this day on the beach. Playing in the water, looking for seashells and making sand castles. It was a lot of fun till it got too hot. After the beach we retired to the pool area for the rest of the day. Nothing exciting, just a repeat of Friday.

Dinner Saturday was Domino’s pizza, they showed National Treasure 2 on a movie screen by the pool,,,a really great evening.

Sunday:
Vic and Alyssa went to the beach to gather shells while I slept in. Then it was pack up time and drive home. Uneventful drive really,,,,,except 1 minor thing. We fed the girls muffins for breakfast anticipating stopping at a Cracker Barrel or something on the way home. BIG MISTAKE. Between PCB and Columbus, there are plenty of Hardees’, Waffle Houses and McDonalds, but no descent restaurants. So, we got the girls some snacks and trucked on to Columbus. Then on home.

Well, that’s pretty much the story of our 2008 vacation. After I recover from my surgery, sometime this fall, we may do it again, but that’s a big question mark right now.


Posts I forgot to make:
Alyssa graduated from Pre-K last week. It was a nice little ceremony and we're very proud of her.




While getting ready for the vacation, Alyssa and Gracie had a minor conflict with Hailey. They resolved this conflict in the normal manner.




OK, that's all for now. Surgery is 1 week from today and needless to say, I’m not real excited about it. But it’s better than having my nose rot off. Gotta look at the positives.

Quick Update

We're back from our trip to the Riveria. I'm working on a complete post, but for now, Vic grabbed some pics of the Hog Rock BBQ and Pawn Headquaters on our way back. Here they is.